Sunday, May 30, 2010

I suppose that a modern day non–Hindu mantra sits somewhere between a prayer, a habit and a superstition. It’s something chanted, listened to or carried out which somehow helps one to blot out all that is around thus enabling the mantrist (Is there such a word? If not I claim it as my own!) to focus on that which needs to be achieved and nothing else around.

I’ve been thinking about this. In fact as I was writing the first paragraph it occurred to me that I was muttering to myself! I’d never really thought about it before. I’m a very poor typist and even after years of banging away at my keypad I still often have trouble finding the letters. So I say ‘where are you little B’, or ‘come here you naughty W’ and the key magically appears!

I must just tell you this! I have problem with my keyboard at the moment. Because I tend to nibble cookies and things as I type I get a build-up of crumbs and other gastronomic debris between the buttons, so now and again I attack the keypad with my vacuum cleaner hose. Well, I got a new cleaner the other day because the old one packed up and went Hoover Heaven (not actually true, I took it to the community tip). For a long time it had got less and less effective and it sucked dust in at the front it blew it out of the back! I did wonder at one stage if the dust cloud hanging over England which stopped flights was less to do with the Icelandic volcano and more about my Vacuum cleaner! Anyway, I used my smart new black machine to clear out my keys yesterday and it was so powerful that it sucked up one of the letters! I only discovered which one had gone when I spelt the name of that black and white striped animal that looks like a donkey, ‘ ebra’!

I digress! The other thing I need is quiet music. It’s always classical and more often than not spiritual. Right now I’m listening to the Faura Requiem. Nothing too rousing or I go double speed and the spell checker throws its hands up in defeat!

My grandfather was a funny chap. He had a couple of mantras which he employed regularly. Every morning as  he shaved and went about his daily ablutions he used to quote the bible. I supposed it helped him concentrate on the task in hand. How, I really don’t know! But it wasn't any old preaching. His wife’s name was Maudy and he used to go ‘I’ll lift up my hands Maudy, and say unto him Maudy, father I have sinned against heaven Maudy and am no more worthy Maudy to be called thy son Maudy’. Come to think of it, Maudy had a sort of Mantra too. Her task was to make sure things were turned off before retiring to bed, and she’d wander from room to room tightening every tap and checking every plug muttering ‘off, off, off...!

Grandpa’s other one was more of a plea! If it was a sunny day and we going for a family picnic, he’d go out the back garden and point up to any cloud that happened to be passing and shout ‘Send it down David’ at the top of his voice in the hope it would start raining! Quite what David had to do with it I was never entirely sure!

You are probably thinking what a weird lot we are! But I bet if you give a bit of thought to your habits you’ll find you are not so different! Now admit it, when a black cat crosses your path, you spin round three times and spit on your little finger!

I've finished. Time to turn off the soothing music of Mo-art and stick on some Led -eppelin!

This weeks Carry On Tuesday prompt is right HERE!


  1. Oh, man, this is great, Keith, an oasis of fun on this sunny day in the USA. Send it down David! Send it down David! Send it down...

    Nothing. Yet.

    Well, I’ll keep trying ; )

  2. Well...someone sent rain to southern USA....we're sitting with it off and on for the majority of a week!!!

    I liked your rambling ;) It made me smile.

    Also, thanks for your comment on my post :)

  3. You drew me in, kept me astonished! You may be a weird lot, but aren't we all...makes for a good read too!! If only more would kiss and tell....they'd be as interesting as you!!! Love it, love it, love it! I bought some liquid air for my cookie monster crumbs!!!

    Hugs Giggles

  4. a post with a LOT of Pizzazzz
    Or on your computer Pi a
    I always enjoy how weird you are Keith!
    would love you to recommend a classical piece for me. That is one genre I'm not too familiar with. 30 years ago I purchased from TV.. classical music for people who hate classical music and I fell in love with certain songs. Cannon in D and Clare de lune were two. but I would LOVE to familiarize myself with more.

  5. Hi Keith, thanks for your visit. Your stories really made me smile! It's nice to know somebody else talks to their keyboard! I have problems with the elusive shift key! I hope you found your 'e' key! Jae

  6. Your Grandfather must have passed through here - there is a wind blowing in dark clouds and David is getting ready to send it down!

    I go around and turn things off (mantra-less) but hubby will follow behind me. We have several halls in the house where you can turn the lights off and on at either end. Depending on where you are, one switch may be in the off position while the lights are on. Hubby cannot stand this and goes around turning them off and on until they are correct. It drives him crazy so I sometimes do it on purpose :)

  7. This is so hilarious I have tears in my eyes! hahahah

    I share your cookie/keyboard problem. One day I removed the keys off the keyboard to clean the crumbs and etc from underneath but reattaching the keys was not easy and I had a trouble with the space key. I had to press it really hard otherwise my text wouldbelikethis.

    And I do talk to myself when I'm alone, it's healthy I think. I hope. ;)

    Great post, Keith!

  8. One of the delights in life is to read your posts and laugh out loud. You have probably nudged a few grey cells in all of us to remember those little quirks of our now gone relatives and brought them back to life for a few moments.

    This is superb writing.

  9. Hi Keith,

    This is excellent and entertaining writing. I adore reading and being tantaliZed by humorous meanderings and recollections. I'll definitely be back to read more.

    (Please note: my google account is not connected to my blog so Please click here for my response to Mantra)

  10. Another wonderful snippet. Oh, I have a vacuum cleaner for you. Mine hums and picks up nothing. And your stories about the grandparents really brought them to life. May you be blessed, may your writing be blessed, may even your keyboard be blessed!



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