The other day my friend Rosey contacted several of us regarding a summit (her word) she wished to arrange at which she hoped we would all agree to join her in a ‘dry January’. I asked where the meeting was to take place and she told me it would be at the Bicycle Arms, our local pub. I found this choice of venue somewhat ironic considering we were to discuss having a break from consuming alcohol, but as she correctly pointed out, they do sell soft drinks and alcohol free beer too.
We duly met up yesterday evening, six of us in all. Rosey said she wanted us all to stay completely sober for the rest of the month in order to a) lose weight, b) save a bit of money and c) give the liver a rest. I, and several others I suspect, agreed to join in her campaign whist crossing our fingers behind our backs! And we got off to a pretty good start; for our first round we ordered fruit juices various and cokes. After a couple of bland rounds the conversation went from dull to boring to stop. I for one couldn’t wait to get home where my bottle of very special old malt was wondering where I’d got to!
Anyway, Rosey volunteered to get the third round in, and she wandered up to bar with that faraway look on her face which she always adopts when she’s plotting something. I gave her a minute or so, then walked to the bar and offered to help with bringing the drinks back to the table; and of course, see what she was up to. My suspicions were well founded. Just as I joined her I saw Barry the Barman pop a large measure of vodka into her coke!
And so it was her well intentioned scheme came to a halt. We all agreed it was a non starter. We spent the rest of the evening brainstorming other possible resolutions which went from stupid and funny to hilarious. We ended up agreeing to a) lose weight by walking to the pub b) save money by not paying for a cab to and from the pub and c) give liver a rest by not eating pâté for a month.
To read all about My Friend Rosey, just click HERE!