A know a guy who plays in a rock band. His name is Stuart but he calls himself Styler. That’s because his hero is Steven Tyler, but whereas the Aerosmith front man plays stadiums, he does his shrieking and strumming in back street boozers. He’s tried to get the look right too; you know the kind of thing; hairy, baggy shirts, mile long scarfs and skinny jeans. Sadly however, in Styler’s case the effect is more monstrous than magnificent!
I was taking a short cut along a scruffy backstreet the other day. It was quite breezy and the rubbish that normally lurks in the doorways and gutters was bowling along the pavement. Walking towards me came Stuart- sorry, Styler, leaning into the wind with his hand on his head. “Hi Sty” I said and I stuck out my hand to give his a shake. He took his hand from his head in order to respond, and suddenly his hair blew into the air and flew down the street! I spun round to see where it was heading (pardon the pun!) and I saw darting back in our direction at high speed with four tiny scuttling legs poking out of it! A little way behind, an old fellow was tottering along shouting “Tinkerbelle, Tinkerbelle, heel, heel girl”
I don’t know which was the funnier sight; Styler’s expression or his never-before-seen shiny bald head! Or the hapless dog owner, or the animated wig. Anyway, without saying a word Styler suddenly took off in pursuit of of his crowning glory. I haven’t seen him since. I wonder if he got it back!