Friday, July 11, 2008

This and that

1. I'm on the move
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I’ve got a new job! Well, not actually a new job, it’s the same job but I’m doing it somewhere else! I’m moving three miles up the road from my present kitchen at the Bulls Head to the Red Lion in the old smuggling village of Hooe.


Now if you sufficiently interested to look it up on a map or on Google Earth you will immediately wonder how come smugglers come ashore 5 miles from the sea. Well over the years the ocean has receded to its present position leaving many of what were coastal villages, miles inland.

It is also thought that Hooe was where William the Conqueror came ashore in 1066. Anyway, I start there on Tuesday next.


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2. An optical illuson

Take a look at this. Right now you should be seeing a picture of Albert Einstein. Now get up off your backside, take a walk 8 feet or so away then look again
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Now you should be looking at Marilyn Monroe. Muah.
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3. Up and down
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I had a roller coaster ride yesterday. It was my birthday and although I had to work, everyone around me made it as special as possible. My morning kitchen helper Tia gave me a goody bag of individually wrapped pressies – chocolate, a cake and a badge which I had to wear on my whites informing everyone that I was a year older! The owners of the pub gave me a bottle of my favourite scotch. In the evening my assistant Hanah sang to me for 4 hours! During the day I spoke to all my kids and my parents.

But this evening I had to tell my regular customers from the village that I was leaving the pub. Most of them I won’t see again before I go, and the whole thing was very emotional.

4. Up and down part 2

How about this for helping the planet! A new night club somewhere in England has been fitted with a dance floor which converts the movement of shuffling feet into enough electricity to power the DJs equipment! I also heard today about a sports bra for joggers which powers a built in generator with which to run an Ipod! Seems it works by the up and down movement which occurs during an energetic run.

A chicken walks up to a duck which was about to cross the road, and says 'Don't do it mate, you'll never hear the end of it!'

5. I was thinking earlier...

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My days are spent surrounded by people. Lovely people - those I love to work with and family whom I love to love.

I need to party - I'm never happier than when I am in a crowd. I'm outgoing, and enjoy being the centre of attention. I'm an exhibitionist who is never happier than when giving it my all on a karaoke machine! I crave company, and thank my God that people want to be with me.

Then I go to back to my home. It's quiet as a grave. Not a sound. The noises in my head fade away and the riotous laughter becomes a distant murmur.

Private moments. Moments alone. Alone with my thoughts. At one with myself.

Time to think and space to enjoy. Time to reflect on what has gone before, and speculate on what is to come in the future.

Silence. Stillness. Peace . Tranquillity. Bliss.
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6. How about this for a stretched limo.

It's a Trabbant by the way and I spotted in Prague last year.


7. Talking of bras.
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Marks and Spencer are the largest retailers of underwear in the UK. But today they've caused a storm by deciding that larger brassieres, size EE upwards ( or downwards if the bra is a bad fit) will be sold at a higher price that the lower sizes. Well this has not gone down well. Larger ladies don’t see why they should be financially penalised for something they have no control over.

They further point out that other ranges of clothing are always priced the same price, whatever size they are. M&S say there is more material in a larger bra, but the protestors point out that there is more material in a tent size dress, yet it’s always sold at the same price as a size 0 in the same range. I’ll try to keep abreast of developments

If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you
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8. And finally
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Yesterday a nineteen year old girl felt something strange in her bra. She investigated and found a baby bat fast asleep inside! Absolutely true!
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7 comments:

  1. Keith that is a lot of things I've learned and some things that well were bizarre, but you are a well of knowledge sir!!

    May you be blessed with pleasant dreams. Did I tell you yet you don't look a day over 30 :)

    Missy

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  2. lol...that was a lot of trivia i learnt today...

    and many many wishes for the year ahead...

    :)

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  3. Happy Belated birthday my dear. Loved this whole post. I too love the social end of things, used to be more outgoing and the center of attention...Now, not so much. But I love the solace of my own company too. After all it's hard to be creative with a whole pile of people around! As for the bra thing...who are they fooling..they have always been more money for the bigger sizes.
    Little titties get off easy!!

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  4. Oh Keith missed your birthday A very belated happy birthday I will take a drink on you. Also congrats with your new job. Looks like a great place.
    It is good to have a bit of balance There is a time for socialising and a time for reflection. Have a nice day

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  5. Sorry I missed you birthday Sweetie. I really hope it was fantastic!
    Very interesting this and that post. I wish you well in your new position and please don't let pirate hauntings get you down. They're really nice fellows, when you get to know them.

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  6. 1. HA - now I know where to find you when I come to England. I'd like a steak please.

    2. Weird. And You KNOW I'm stealing it.

    3. Wow - a bittersweet sort of day, eh? But overall lovely.

    4. That's brilliant. I've often thought I could harness the dogs' wagging tails and create energy.

    Snorting about the duck joke and the skydiving.

    5. I love karaoke. I'm not as much of a crowd person, but I love to perform.

    6. It looks like something you'd buy ice cream from.

    7. The picture leaves me speechless. But they're wrong about the dress thing - a number of companies charge more for the larger size clothing. "I’ll try to keep abreast of developments." {snicker}

    8. Words fail me.

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