Saturday, January 05, 2008

Writers Island - Over the horizon

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I’ve always been fascinated by mermaids. All the best bits of a woman without the complications! And I’ve always thought that I should be able to buy one at the fish counter in the superstore. 38 – 24 - £2 a pound!


Anyway, this week’s prompt on Writers Island led me toward a story about a baby mermaid – a 'merbabe' I suppose you could call it! (Come to think of it, how do 'merpeople' have babies?) Anyway this is it!
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The mid day sun glistened on the sea. A dazzling display of diamonds sparkling atop ripples rolling into a golden sandy cove. Just off the shore an occasional glimpse of a mermaid. Gliding effortlessly through her world of water, queen of all she surveyed.
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Turning on to her back she raised her outstretched arms toward the sky and in her hands she balanced her mermaid child. A tiny fragile creature setting out on a life among the people of the ocean. Princesse de la Mer.
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‘Go my child’ said the mermaid. ‘Take your place beneath the waves. You are the chosen one. Your people are waiting for you’.

‘Where shall I go’ she asked.

‘Over the horizon’ her Mother said.

‘How will I know when I am there?’ said the child.

‘You will know little one. You will know’

And with that she was gone. She glanced back over her shoulder to wave goodbye,but saw no one. She was alone. All alone.



She swam among a rainbow of fishes, through forests of corals and above deep dark places that made her shiver. But the horizon came no closer. Her Mothers words kept coming back to her. ‘Over the horizon’

‘How far is the horizon?’ she asked a dolphin. ‘As far as you can see and farther’ he said.

Which way is the horizon?’ she asked a starfish. ‘That way child’ he said pointing in every direction.

‘How long will it take?’ she asked an oyster. ‘How long is a string of pearls?’ came back the reply.
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‘I’m tired, may I ride on your back?’ she asked a sea horse. ‘No young one’ he said. ‘I can play no part in your journey’.

Suddenly all around her glowed brightly. Everywhere were exotic flowers of every colour snaking toward the daylight above.
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Carpets of coral put on a display of brilliant lights, and before her was a towering rock of silver and gold, embedded with flashing jewels.
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A voice came from nowhere. ‘A deep soft comfortable voice. ‘Your journey is over Princesse de la Mer. Join your people’

And with that, a hundred little mermaids swam toward her from every direction. They formed a circle around her and swam and frolicked and laughed with joy. They formed a nest of arms and gently lifted her higher and higher until she found herself above the waves.

No longer could she see the horizon. The sky formed a giant dome above and around her, and it was filled with birds, butterflies and fragrant aromas. She had arrived in paradise.

‘Take your place upon the rock’ said the voice. ‘The rock over the horizon. The place where you belong'.
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A little ditty!
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Over the horizon a mountain builds
from clouds of deepest grey.
A backdrop to a rainbow arch.
A luminous display.
White shapes swoop and climb then dive.
A swirling mass of gulls at play.
Over the horizon a storm looms large,
then slowly fades away.
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39 comments:

  1. This is lovely, I really enjoyed reading it! Then I read your Sunday Scribblings and suddenly an hour had gone by and I was still glued....this is a great blog! I found you through 'Just Expressing Myself'...I'm so glad I did.

    I look forward to reading more:)

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  2. Hey there Keith,

    I love this story so very much. Now this is one that needs to be continued. I love it, you make me want to be a merbabe lol.

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  3. I wanna be a merbabe too!!!!!

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  4. This is magical! This could be the next blockbuster Walt Disney annimated movie. I bit this would be a good illustrated children book, it would surely be a bestseller. The child in me is awaken reading this. You sure know what to write for an audience.

    Here's my article for the prompt this week. Please click link below:

    http://jeques.wordpress.com/2008/01/06/the-flickering-lights-over-the-horizon/

    I wish you well.

    ~ Jeques

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  5. This was such a beauty, Keith. I know I am gonna tell it to my little girl as she loves mermaids, so do I :)...thanks for trying the SS as well.

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  6. Fun read ... a fairy tale of lovely proportions :) Peace, JP/deb

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  7. what a lovely read!!! a merbabe?...:) in keeping with the times keith...

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  8. Okay, all right, I'm guilty..., I haven't yet read this post. I will soon, I promise. I'm here for another purpose...,

    How about being a "Blogger of the World"? I nominate you and your web site for the award, which I proudly accepted from AngelBaby.

    Angel has an article on her site about angels and a miracle which I think all should read, but I think you will like. The link is on my site, Gimme A Dream. You can pick up your award and the link at the same time.

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  9. Beautiful story! Mush come back in the future to read more of your blog.

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  10. This would make a wonderful kids story! I love the little merbabe she is so cute!! You have such a way with making a story live Keith.

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  11. A wonderful, light hearted "tail"! (get it?) Quite the opposite from the Grimm's brother's stuff. I've never heard the term merbabe. Creative!

    That Feed the Turtles game can really make you waste a lot of time! haha!

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  12. Wonderful fantasy nugget! And I understand how to feed your turtles now, thanks!

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  13. Nice one keith.. the journey was described very well

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  14. I laughed at the opening prose, then thought maybe I could order a merMan. Well. The story is such a delight, I'm still smiling. Absolutely too fun. And the ditty was close enough to perfect for me!

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  15. I liked this fantasy short story. Merbabes! I like that term too.

    Thanks Keith!

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  16. Keith, I loved this! All my life I've been fascinated by mermaids. Almost drowned once, believing that if I stayed underwater and drank the water in my grandmother's pool, I would transform into a mermaid... Your little merbabe journey was enchanting... and I loved the ditty... could imagine you watching this very thing happen...

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  17. This is marvellous Keith, the possibilities are endless here, movie, book, series, life lessons and so bery much more - no matter kids or adults everyone is going to LOVE your merbabe! Congratulations!

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  18. What an enchanting story. Oh how I'd like to visit that kingdom under the sea...

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  19. wow, what a metaphor. truly unique and inspiring. i guess we all have the "merbabe" attitude. as much as possible we depend on others but we should find our own way to define our life. thanks for a very inspiring read :-)

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  20. That's a very sweet story for all ages! Wonderful metaphor too. Well done, you!

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  21. Wow! This was enchanting. After reading your introductory preamble I was expecting something sexist. It's interesting that out of the great sea of the unconscious this prompt has lead to thoughts of rainbows, circles and coral for me too. I too live close to the south coast of England - a little further west than you.

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  22. Hi keith,

    Nice header you have with the snowsea! Yes I like mermaids, but I like the male-mermaid, can you order me one please?
    I have been feeding you turtles too, haha but I don't think they like Dutch food?

    Have a great and inspring 2008!
    Greetings from Dutch JoAnn

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  23. You do have a wonderful imagination... I loved the story.. and wished it would go on some more .. like a great book that we dont want to end!!!

    Over the Horizon

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  24. More please? You know what I see here? I children's picture book....I really do...this has the makings of one I know thousands of little girls would love everywhere.

    I am so glad you wrote this. Even the little end ditty would fit in the book. Really think about it.

    MY meager first entry can be found at: http://wannabeawritersomeday.blogspot.com/

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  25. some journeys can only been travel by yourself. what a wonderful tale.

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  26. mermaids...my son when he was young fell in love w/mermaids he use to love to draw them....and now to read your take it is a beautiful story..i wanna go where water is as air and heaven resides...btw dig the new site and congrats on yr award...

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  27. As I began to read the story part, a little girl came on the tv and started playing this beautiful song on the piano. It complimented the story perfectly!

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  28. I agree with what others have said: this would make a charming children's book!

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  29. a merbabe...how cute and adorable! i love mermaids...remember Madison from Splash (tom hanks film)? my daughter just loved this story when she was growing up.

    i so liked this story. a children's book on Le Petit Marbebe, perhaps? this was so sweet.

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  30. Wow Keith--So beautifully written.You have a way with words! I loved the oyster's reply.

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  31. Of course I thought I'd tried looking for a hyperlink in your 'it's here' post, then when I went back there I found it!

    I love this story. All it needs is a good illustrator to turn it into a delightful children's book that adults would secretly enjoy as well.

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  32. Keith!! You have the makings of a FANTASTIÇ childrens book here! You HAVE to pursue publishing this beautiful 'tail' I'm Very SErious, I've read zillions of kids books to my 3 and I Know this is a winner baby!! I can just see the bright illustrations! Wonderful, wonderful story!

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  33. I have been abslutely staggered by the comments I have received about this little story - there are far too many to reply to individually. As I wrote it, it occurred to me that it needed some colourful pictures to compliment it, but your suggestions that has the potential to be published has taken me by surprise! As I have no idea how to make this happen, I guess it will sink into oblivion as new posts take its place!

    So thank you so much. You make it all worthwhile.

    I need to thank my children my parents and my bottle of Errazurez Merlot 2002 without whom none of this would have been possible.....

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  35. Very lovely story, Keith. I have always wanted to be a mermaid/babe but unfortunately I am leery of the ocean..though I love it.

    S

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  36. a dream-land... and a very cute merbaby!

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  37. That was a fabulous story! I loved your imagery and word choice. Thanks for the warm welcome to the island.

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  38. Absolutely adorable story....more please! Exactly what a mother would say to her offspring! Beautiful imagery. I agree this would make a lovely childs book. A series even....move over JK here comes Keith!

    Peace Giggles

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  39. Beautiful....can u write some more ??
    Merbabe sounds so lovely and the story needs to go on...

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