Flash Fiction for Aspiring Writers
I’ve been driving for ages. I should be back in the city by now. But I’m not. Where am I?
My engine just spluttered. It’s stopping, I’m stopping. Oh no, the petrol gauge says empty. But I filled up before I left. How can it be? I’ll have to walk. Where's my torch? It should be in here. Where is it? It's gone.
Where am I? It is so dark. I can’t hear my footsteps? Where’s the moon gone? Why’s it so quiet? Why so still? I’m cold. I am so cold.
Is there anybody there? Please, help me. Where am I? Where am I...?
Word count 156
Thanks to Priceless Joy for hosting and to Pamela S. Canepa for the picture.
Sounds like one of my bad dreams. Oh no, I'm falling....
ReplyDeleteDon't worry, I'll catch you!
DeleteEither an analogy for death, a horrible nightmare or the start of a chilling sci-fi. All would be a fit. Nice writing as always Keith.
ReplyDeleteAll of the above? Thanks so much Iain
DeleteHe's dead. On the other hand, I was reminded of the opening sequence to an old TV show called "The Invaders" (1967-68):
ReplyDeleteThe invaders: alien beings from a dying planet. Their destination: the Earth. Their purpose: to make it their world.
It began with a closed, deserted diner, and a man too long without sleep to continue his journey. It began with the landing of a craft from another galaxy...Now, David Vincent knows that the invaders are here. That they have taken human form. Somehow he must convince a disbelieving world that the nightmare has already begun…
My, you have a great memory! Now you come to mention it I do see certain similarities. Thanks James
DeleteChilling story! I could relate to part of it because I have been lost driving too, but the ending is so frightening! Great story!
ReplyDeleteI hope you had a happier ending to your journey PJ!
DeleteChilling, it could be a dream , a nightmare. Wanted to know more clearly the end of the well-written mysterious story, Keith.
ReplyDeletehttps://ideasolsi65.blogspot.in/2017/09/the-night.html
Even I'm not sure Kalpana and I wrote it! I enjoy leaving my readers in the dark - literally in this piece!
DeleteHi Keith - not something I'd like to be doing ... losing one's way or not knowing where the road goes to ... turning around isn't really an option ... certainly chilled me - though it's morning ... cheers Hilary
ReplyDeleteBetter wrap yourself in a blanket Hilary. I'd hate to think I'd given you a cold!
DeleteI read the end of life. Hope modern civilizations have helpline numbers to reach out.
ReplyDeleteI hope so too! Thanks Reena
DeleteVery eerie. I love it.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much Joshua
DeleteIs that a NDE... near death experience? or Is he returning from the far off galaxy only to find the cold vibes dwelling in the darkness??
ReplyDeleteSo many possibilities...loved it!!!
- Anagha From Team MocktailMommies
Read into it whatever you will! Thanks so much Anagha
DeleteStart running! And don't stop- no matter what!!
ReplyDeleteI quite agree! Thanks Vivian
DeleteAlthough it's clear what is happening in your story, it also reminds me of when I flew into Nova Scotia and got a brand new rental agent for my car hire. It took her two hours to get through the line and by the time I drove away in a too-fancy car that I couldn't understand, it was 10 at night and pitch black. I didn't know where to plug in the GPS I'd bought specifically for this trip, didn't understand any of the controls, had no map and no idea where I was headed. I got on the divided highway and headed north with no idea of where I was. In the end, I phoned a friend in Missouri and he functioned as my GPS until I got to my motel two hours later. But....until I thought of that solution, I felt exactly as described in your piece.
ReplyDeleteI can't imagine what that must be like. Even writing my fictional piece gave me the shivers! Thanks so much for your comment.
DeleteCompletely chilling. Sounds like one of my horror dreams
ReplyDeleteI did actually wake up during the night with this tale running around my mind! Thanks Lavanya
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