Saturday, January 28, 2017

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Post 1435. Saturday January 28

The Sunday Whirl


I stood on the stony track outside Hawthorn Cottage. Unwise it clearly was, but  I needed to see inside. Then and there.

The eaves did little to protect me from the drizzle as I edged my way along the moss covered wall, my feet snagging on overgrown thorny plants. Shabby curtains hung forlornly across the filthy windows so the only way for me to peer inside was to be through a skylight. I stumbled my way to a crooked coal bunker which creaked, threatening to collapse as I climbed upon it. As I heaved myself onto the sloping roof, there was a clatter as several tiles shattered on the paved area beneath. Had I been heard? I held my breath. No. Clambering on hands and knees, I reached the skylight. Years of tobacco smoke had stained the glass a dirty brown, so using a tile I smashed a hole in its centre.

Many years ago, a brutal murder took place at Hawthorn  Cottage. An elderly lady was slain by an opportunist thief who wasn’t expecting her to put up a fight.  No-one attended her funeral. Was she not someone's mother? Grandmother? But then I never knew my Grandmother. I've never questioned it; it was a taboo subject in our house.

I peered through the broken glass. There was furniture scattered everywhere. Upturned chairs and toppled tables. There on the floor, lay a frame, its glass shattered. I could just make out the faded photograph within. It was a picture of me.




This week's words at The Sunday Whirl are eaves, plants, sky, hole, crooked, world, wise, tobacco. grandmother, first and there.


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20 comments:

  1. Wow! This one was a masterpiece of writing, Keith, it took my breath away!

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    1. Thank you for your kind and generous words JJ

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  2. You have the knack, this is gripping!

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  3. Hi Keith - just occasionally we come across a death that's of an unknown ... poor woman - one wonders why so lonely - yet the photo shows there are relatives ... haunted cottage - not for me! Cheers Hilary

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    1. We do indeed Hilary, but fortunately they rarely turn out to be our relatives as here!

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  4. Loved your narration. Vivid and so gripping. The end was unexpectedly sad rather than horrid.

    Aditi

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    1. I'm pleased it came over that way - mission accomplished!

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  5. Oooh, lead by the nose toward an unexpected ending. Nicely done, Keith.

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  6. The last six words really hit home! Well-written, indeed.

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    1. I think wasn't my original ending, just a last minute idea. Thanks for dropping by.

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  7. This quite your genre of writing Keith. Curious or mysterious actions and a resolution which touches the heart. Excellent.

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    1. I really appreciate your comment OE. Thanks so much

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  8. This made me feel so sad. I often wonder, as a roam around a Goodwill Store and peer at all the stuff that people donate, how many lifetimes did that object see before it ended up on this shelf? How many more will it see?
    Its the same with people too, I guess.

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    1. I do the same, I often purchase things I don't need because I sense the history behind it. You should see the stripy blazer I brought last week! On second thoughts perhaps you shouldn't!

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  9. Well done ... this grabbed me by the throat and never let go.

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  10. Even with your clever clue I got chills at the end. Great piece!

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