Sunday, March 20, 2011

Trouble in Alphabet Land!

Alphabet Land is an odd place. For a start, most places have one capital, but Alphabet Land has 26. It is governed by the Vowels who skilfully hold together a diverse community of Consonants and Punctuations. Most lead separate lives, but some of them live together quite naturally. C’s and K’s get on well as do as do Q’s and U’s. There are several P’s with S’s who are silent partners, and some double L’s who moved there from Wales. Twins abound, the double D’s and double T’s are very popular couples.

Recently there was a problem with a crowd of brutish X’s and Z’s who had become inseparable and were making the lives of the other letters intolerable. An emergency meeting of the Vowels was held when it was decided that they needed to be separated. First to offer their services were the Hyphens, after all they were used to keeping groups of letters apart. The Full Stops thought they could possibly call a halt, and the Colons and their junior partners the Semis felt that they might at least be able to slow things down a bit.

Unfortunately they refused to heed the warnings and the Brackets were sent to catch them. They were taken to court where they were warned they'd be sentenced if they refused to abide by the Law of the Letters.

The X’s and Z’s promised not to congregate in a crowd again. The Numbers had been brought in from the adjoining state to help decide if their pleas added up to anything and they had certain doubts, but the Plusses outnumbered the Minuses and it was decided to set them free. Outside the court the Y’s questioned the decision, and unsurprisingly the P’s held a meeting of their own in the toilet.

Right now all is calm and quiet in Scrabble Square and at Crossword Corner.


  1. Oh always get me with these wonderful little tales. Now I need to ask about pronunciation and all those names that seem to have absolutely NO vowels. Those of us that are english speakers are totally stumped! Help!


  2. Enjoyed this immensely. Very well done!

  3. What a breathe of fresh air to read your post and laugh with the fun of letters and their fight to get noticed.

  4. That is funny, entertaining , and very clever Keith.

  5. Exceptionally witty, to the point of being brilliant. It's something I could imagine John Cleese or Ronnie Barker reading. I particularly liked the 'law of the letters' bit.

  6. Today is brought to you by the letter K! Very reading 'Alice' at the moment - I do admire how people can apply the rules of logic and all things maths-y to writing..Jae

  7. Too much fun! Thanks for the entertainment!
    Here's my FREE piece:

  8. OOOh how smart! Just loved this. Joined as a follower. I look forward to more.

  9. Very good! You're a very clever writer!



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