Thursday, June 28, 2007

Sticking up for smokers!

photo keith d hillman

In a couple of days our pubs will be smoke free!
Saturday July 1st will go down in English history as the day that changed the nature - and the smell, of our country's hostelries.
So I have decided to mark the passing of the ancient tradition of smoking at the bar. I will smoke a cigar in the last few minutes before the ban comes into force.
Not any old cigar. I have purchased a fine specimen. A bundle of the finest tobacco leaf, skillfully fashioned and rolled on the thigh of a Cuban virgin.
Armed with an Edinburgh crystal glass of a superb Scotch malt whisky, I will slice off the top of my cigar and light it with a taper. There I will sit in a cloud of mahogany brown smoke, with a smile on my face and a feeling of utter contentment.
At the stroke of midnight I will stub out the remaining piece and carefully wrap it. For several days I will allow it to dry out, after which time I will coat it with varnish and mount it on a plinth of polished oak. It will remain on my mantelpiece, as a reminder of the day that a basic liberty was stripped away from the people of England.
The whole thing however, could go horribly wrong. I am an non-smoker! Instead of my defiant last stand, I could become a choking vomiting wreck curled up on the toilet floor!
So why am I doing it? Simply because I am opposed to the ban. Nothing more - nothing less!
Want to know how I got on? Click here!

7 comments:

  1. I am a non-smoker myself, yet I truly love the smell of cigars and pipes. Pubs are supposed to smell of ales, and smoke and pipes, tis a sad day.

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  2. Here on the islands, smoking is not allowed within 50 feet of a public door, let alone inside. I'm a non-smoker and I don't mind it a bit.

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  3. We have a smoking ban in Omaha also. For the next five years, establishments which serve alcohol only are allowed to have smoking AND establishments that have KENO are allowed to have smoking. Those that serve food may not allow smoking. But in five years EVERYONE has to ban it. The city police advised to report anyone seen smoking in a restaurant when the ban first went into effect. I think I'd rather report TRUE CRIME. LOL.

    I don't like cigarette smoke, but I know I have a choice of whether or not to enter a smoking establishment and do not begrudge anyone their vice.

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  4. Intersting! We are all non smokers yet none of us have a problem with smoking being allowed in pubs and bars!

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  5. So then tell me where those snotty little whingers are hiding and I'll hunt them down whilst I'm over there and make them sit in a cupboard with me smoking and an obnoxious drunk! See which one upsets them the most - lol

    Really, so how has this bill been passed when most non-smokers aren't really bothered? Curious!

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  6. Don't know on what you base your assumption that most non-smokers don't mind. We (non-smokers) have had no choice in the past, but to endure filthy, smoke-filled pubs, knowing that it will likely lead to an unpleasant and untimely death. High time that smokers were isolated - as all diseases are.

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  7. P.S. Morgy; now smokers have the choice - enter or don't!

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