A slap in the face for Colin!

Liked to new prompt site - Topic Thursday 'Comedy'

Comedy Colin they call him. He always has a joke. He never actually says hello. I saw him in the street the other day and he rushed up to me with a big grin on his face, and before I could utter a word, he giggled “Where do wasps go to when they are ill?” “Hi Colin” I said “where do wasps go when ….” and before I’d finished my sentence he shouted “A waspital! Get it Keith? A waspital!” And with that, he burst out laughing, slapped me on the back almost knocking me off my feet, and set off down the road.

Last week I was in the pub with my friend Rosey and he spotted her across the bar. He darted this way and that between the tables pointing at her as he progressed, an enormous smile on his face. “Rosey love, Rosey, you’re a teacher…” “Actually I’m a teaching assistant Colin” she said. “Same thing” said Colin as he began chuckling “Anyway, what do you get if you add 3698 to 549 then subtract 153?”  Rosey went along with it. “I don’t know Colin, tell me”. “A headache!”  said Colin. Then off he went, roaring with laughter, banging against the table and slopping my ale into my lap.

It was then we spotted Misery Mike wandering towards us, head bowed. We tried to pretend we hadn’t seen him. “Hello you two” he mumbled “have you heard about poor old Mrs Miles? Such a shame. I’m so cold, what’s the matter with the weather. I got overcharged at the bar just now, and I’m sure my beers off……” “Hello Mike” I interrupted “Tell me, do you know where wasps go when they are ill?” “Don’t talk to me about wasps” he moaned “Got stung by one yesterday”.  That didn’t work!

Suddenly a shrill voice shouted “Colin, how dare you”. The whole pub went quiet and we all turned to see Comedy Colin get a slap on the cheek from Buxom Betty, the barmaid. “That wiped the smile off his face” shouted Misery Mike breaking the silence, and slowly a smile began to creep across his face. Then he laughed… Misery Mike actually laughed! And then, so did everyone else. Except Comedy Colin who just scowled. We never did find out which of Colin’s jokes got him into trouble, but it was worth it just to see Mike look happy for once.