Rosey, a flower and a pot of honey!

 Written for Sunday Scribblings (2nd post) and Carry On Tuesday

So I knocked on my friend Rosey’s front door and when she opened it I said “Life is a flower of which love is the honey”.  Well, she gave me that wrinkled-nose look of hers that requires no verbal embellishment!  “I’m being poetic” I exclaimed. Actually, I almost said ‘romantic’ but I thought that might have been inappropriate, especially I was proffering a flower in one hand a jar of honey in the other at the time. I should explain that Rosey claims honey to be an aphrodisiac. “Paradise is a pot of honey” she once said! She’s never expanded upon nor explained her theory, and none of us has ever had the nerve to ask whether she eats it or applies it - if you get what I mean!

“One flower?” she said “one single flower? Did you steal it from someone’s garden on the way here?” I told her that it was not just any old flower, it was a gerbera and they are quite expensive. Not just that, a single gerbera in a specimen jar is I’m told, the happening coffee table adornment these days.

“What was that about flowers and honey?” she asked. I told her that it was a quote I’d read whilst doing some research for my writers prompt site Carry On Tuesday. I told her it was penned by Victor Hugo back in the 1800’s. I should explain that at the time I was still standing streetwise of her door waiting for an invitation to enter. Well, she suddenly closed the door in my face and yelled at me to shout “knock knock”. As those of you who follow Rosey’s antics know, she is the self-appointed queen of knock- knock jokes. The funniest thing is that invariably she doesn’t get the one she tells us herself! Anyway I went along with it. “Knock knock” I shouted. “Who goes there?” she called back. Realising what she was doing, I played along if only to gain access to the inside of her apartment as I was dying to use the toilet!  “Yes Hugo is here" I shouted. With that the door opened and a grinning Rosey said “Vincent!”  Well, I didn’t bother to correct her; knowing Rosey she deliberately got the name wrong thinking it would improve her joke! 

I didn’t tell you why I was calling on her, gifts in hand. You’ll recall that she found herself a boyfriend; an accountant type name of Gareth. At the time I told you that none of us considered him be Rosey material. He was somewhat dull, and his dreary demeanor was rubbing off on our normally gregarious and extrovert friend. Anyway, they had a disastrous New Year’s Night together at his house and whilst watching a favourite 1930's movie of his from his collection she realised that she was missing the life she enjoyed pre-Gareth. When he asked her for her New Year resolutions it was the perfect opportunity to tell him she was starting 2013 without him. So I thought a flower, a pot of honey and a witty one liner would be just the thing to welcome her back as the Rosey we love and miss.

So, at long last she invited me through the door and as I was walking to her bathroom for a long overdue pee, she asked if I’d like to share some honey! As she said it I glimpsed her putting some toast in the toaster, so I said I would!

Believe it or not, it was five years ago almost to the day that I started telling you about the things my friend Rosey gets up to! In case you didn't know I've put the best 50 or so of her adventures all together in one place . To read a few of  them just visit My Friend Rosey by clicking HERE!